‘Enlightening Conversations’ - Psychology
With so many women going through pregnancy, birth and the start of their postnatal journey during the time of coronavirus, it’s no wonder why mums are feeling more lonely and anxious than ever. What should be a time when you are surrounded by your ‘village’ has turned into isolation from everyone you know and love (besides your immediate family). I chatted to local psychologist Anna Frayne about ways women can help deal with the stress and anxiety of the perinatal period during this difficult time. Anna is a Clinical Psychologist who moved to the Highlands in 2019. She has experience working with new and expectant parents in private practice and through her work at the Gidget Foundation. Anna is currently on maternity leave.
At a time when women will be feeling more anxious and stressed than ever, what are your top 3 tips for women to help deal with these feelings?
I would encourage you to try to stay connected to people in whatever way you can. In particular those people who care about you and make you feel good. Connect with other parents who share similar values to you. You might like to set up regular catch-ups over FaceTime, or other video call options. Please do not hesitate to seek professional support if you are struggling.
Refer to reputable sources of information (such as the Australian Government Coronavirus COVID-19 Health Alert). Although it can be very tempting, limit the amount of time you check for updates, including social media.
Practice mindfulness meditation and breathing exercises. We often hold our breath when we are stressed without realising. If you can, throughout the day, take time to pause and practice 3 mindful breaths. Mindfulness is about trying to be present in the moment. You might like to try one of the following apps: Smiling Mind, CALM, Headspace or Insight Timer. Other examples of activities that offer an opportunity to practice mindfulness include; walking in nature, noticing the sensations of your baby kicking, gazing at your baby or watching your children play.
2) For someone that is afraid of talking about their mental health struggles, what advice do you have for women wanting to make the first step towards help?
Firstly, please know that you are not alone and that help is available. Perinatal depression and anxiety affects 1 in 5 mothers. It can affect anyone. The sooner you seek support, the sooner you will start feeling better. Seeking help shows that you want the best for yourself and your family.
If you are worried about your emotional wellbeing, seek help from a trusted health professional. Talking to your GP is a good first step. Your GP will be able to rule out any physical conditions that may be contributing to your mood and will be able to provide you with a referral to see a mental health professional, such as a psychologist, social worker or a psychiatrist.
Gidget Foundation Australia’s Start Talking program provides free specialist perinatal telehealth counselling services for expectant and new parents nationwide. To access Start Talking, you will need a referral from a GP, including a mental health care plan. Please see www.gidgetfoundation.org.au or call 1300 851 758.
For more immediate support, the PANDA National Helpline is available Mon-Fri 9am-7:30pm 1300 726 306 www.panda.org.au
For 24-hour crisis support, please call Lifeline 13 11 14.
3) Now we can’t forget the dads and dads-to-be in this scenario. Do you have any advice for the father in the family who may also be feeling anxious and stressed?
That’s right. We know that up to 1 in 10 new dads struggle with anxiety or depression in the year following the birth of their baby. I would encourage the dads to practise stress management strategies including exercise, limit alcohol consumption, eating well and talking to someone about what they are experiencing. This time at home could be viewed as an opportunity for you to spend extra time bonding with your baby. Ask friends and family how they are managing. Please seek professional help if you can’t sleep or have difficulty relaxing or if you feel very sad and are no longer enjoying things. You might like to join SMS4dads www.sms4dads.com a project that provides new fathers with text messages with tips, information and links to other services to help fathers understand and connect with their baby and support their partner. You might also like to have a look at the following website www.howisdadgoing.org.au
4) What are your favourite self-care tips for pregnant and new mums to look after their own mental health?
1. Finding time for yourself – this might be taking a shower, going out for a walk or having a lie down to read a book.
2. Exercise – this might be walking around the block with the pram or joining an online mums and bubs yoga or pilates class.
3. Practise breathing and mindfulness meditation exercises.
4. Practise self-compassion. We are often so hard on ourselves and have unrealistic expectations. Practise talking to yourself as you would to a close friend. For example, instead of saying to yourself “I should be able to get more done in a day”, you could try saying, for example “well done for taking the time to connect with my baby”.
5. Connect with your friends and other mums.
6. Try not to be overwhelmed by numerous sources of parenting information and trust yourself (this can take time). Have one or two trusted sources of information such as a GP, child health nurse and a non-judgemental family member or friend.
7. Eat well, drink plenty of water and rest when you can.